The words of the little..

Everything I do is recorded on indelible film in their minds. Every time I lose my cool and react in a less than stellar way they have filed it away in their little pocket of MommyMeltdowns to recall at a later date. Like when we are at lunch. And my five year old asks "what does F*$% mean daddy?".

Luckily my husband is as guilty as I am in that department, and we just hose ourselves, spraying iced tea and diet coke across the table, locking eyes as we try to come up with the most appropriate answer for our precocious yet darling 5 year old....

We finally settled on one that bears signific resonance in her 5 year old perfectly pristine mind and reasoning, and that is "its a naughty word that mom and daddy says sometimes when theyre mad but if you say it at school or in front of your friends you will get into trouble, so don't say it okay sweetie?".She nodded, a cherubim angel, locks as golden as the sun and it dissolved into the air around us. The wrinkles around my husbands eyes from laughing were the only remnants of our little giggle.

Issue was dropped for the meantime until many moons later when it made an abrupt appearance once again in her vocabulary. I was driving my mothers car, we parked it at the bottom of the hill, the autumn leaves swirled at our feet, the sky was grey and ominous. And there was this dastardly clammouring and banging coming from up on the hill next to our house. As we shut the cars doors, and my mother and I gathered up our purchases, there was this little voice that spoke out loud and clear above the infernal banging. The then 4 year old little cherub resonated a Cheshire cat grin when she impishly said "Whats all that f*$%ing noise?". We dropped our bags and looked at her quizzically. And then we turned to each other to confer, did she just say what we thought we heard? And I said "What did you say Shannon?" and she said Whats all that noise mommy?" like butter wouldnt melt in her mouth... and I said "no no no I heard you say something else?" and she giggled and her bitten fingernails and pink sausage fingers went up to her mouth as if she were trying to stuff the laughter that was coming out, back in. And we all then threw our heads back in laughter and just giggled as we walked up the hill. I reiterated that what she said was hysterical (I mean lie and say it was not?) but if she said it at the inappropriate time that she could get punished. She said she got the message. And thus far I think she has. There have been no more F Bombs dropping out of her mouth. But as for me, well I would by lying if I said my lexicon was purely chaste.