A thought just occurred to me after a sudden but very brief illness. How do we learn to expect the unexpected in parenting if books like "what to expect" all the way through the preteen years give you a false sense that this sort of should be going on an expected track. That somehow all this craziness and mayhem leads to the same place. When maybe it doesn't.
This thought came to me when I was suffering from a stomach bug that my kids had so kindly given to me, despite the fact that I washed my hands so much they felt like sand paper and that all of the hard surfaces in my house stank of bleach. There I was, head shoved in the washing machine at four am, dealing with my daughters stomach bug issues, suddenly dealing with my own stomach bug issues... And although I have another older daughter, she's 9, no where in any book did I ever come across any seriously helpful or useful information on how to handle yourself or your household when you yourself fall ill to some nasty virus.
The only thing my daughter(s) (yes they both succumbed) wanted was her mommy... And the only person I wanted was MY mommy...
For two days I lay in bed with one eye open, its spring break, husband had to be at work, I missed two days of work this week, and I listened to their monster feet plodding through the house. Through the vibrations of the cardboard house and the cardboard walls I could keep an auditory visual on their whereabouts. Until they fell silent and I had to go and check on them. I had told my nine year old to ensure that her sister (four) did not do anything dangerous and to call me if she did. Otherwise I lay curled up in a ball, watching the clock, wishing I could sleep, befriending my bucket, and really really wishing I could call my mommy to make all things better for me.
Whilst in a half sleepy feverish stupor, I discovered that my daughter had moisturized the floor, had eaten all of the oreos and the girl scout cookies, and that my nine year old had "cooked" ramen noodles. Praise Jesus for ramen noodles otherwise the poor kids would have not survived. They stayed inside although the weather was gloriously mild and their swing set got to blow in the gentle breeze, all alone. I told them if they went outside someone would steal them and I would never see them again. So they stayed put. Thank God.
And this was a brief illness. How do moms cope when they have real problems? How do you have kids, raise them the right way, deal with all of life's demands, as well as be physically ill. There is one mom at the kids' school who has lupus and she is such a grand dame of smiles and congenial delight that you would never swear that anything is wrong with her. I would not be her. I would be, as I have been, in the same clothes for three days, with my hair in my kids' hair elastic, it has a heart on it and its pretty and it makes me feel better, and my life would be a wreck.
Thank the Father that I feel better today and can actually string a sentence together... And thank the Father for beautiful children who took care of each other and for a husband who came home after 13 hours at work with a bucket of fried chicken for the kids. Thank you for my family.
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